


Sudden Drops in Shallow Waters

by daintylemonsquare



Category: Dalton Academy Series
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Rane - Freeform, Reed tops, no ragrets, pornstar AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-04 14:50:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20472836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daintylemonsquare/pseuds/daintylemonsquare
Summary: Reed meets a pornstar he likes on his birthday. He didn't expect the pornstar to be so persistent.





	Sudden Drops in Shallow Waters

Reed was having a fantastic birthday. He was in Universal. He was with his step brother and his bandmates. Sure, he’d almost fallen over three railings waiting in line. Sure, Haven’s disguises were as ridiculous on the ground than they were on rides and they attempted to keep their wigs, sunglasses, and false facial hair in place. Sure, the combination of sweat, sunscreen, and theme park ride water made his skin beg for a thorough bath. But that was the fun of a theme park and Clark and his friends dragging him on to every ride available then buying him the sweetest thing at the nearest shop. And he wasn’t wearing anything he cared about. 

They just got their almost abhorrent amount of pizza for lunch and were looking for a table when Reed saw him. He was walking towards a kiosk of novelty souvenirs with a group Reed only half recognized. He shoved a person in front of him for a comment Reed couldn’t hear. They had a playful, childish fight when one of their friends cut it out. His grin was radiant and unmistakable in the way that it made Reed’s lower stomach quiver. If that wasn’t enough of a confirmed, the man leaned onto kiosk and Reed would know those taut legs anywhere. Adrenaline began to pump through him like he was on a rollercoaster. 

“That family just left,” Raven exclaimed. “Go! Go! Go!” 

“Reed?” Clark called but Reed was already a few steps in. “Where are you going?” 

“Just a second!” He smiled over his shoulder, ran into a couple of strangers, apologized, and stumbled his way to the kiosk. 

Reed didn’t make a habit of going up to people he knew but who didn’t know him. The sun must’ve gotten to him. His brain must’ve been so addled with dopamine that his mind wasn’t working so other parts of his body had to do his thinking for him. Most of the time, he’d be too afraid of looking, sounding, and acting like a total awkward fool that he wouldn’t bother. But this was the perfect moment. 

He was in a large theme park filled with people. He would never see this man ever again. He was soaked in questionable water. His clothes were bought at a random souvenir shop the day before. His mom wasn’t breathing on his shoulder. And he wasn’t ever going to see another pornstar in the wild, let alone a pornstar he enjoyed way more than he was willing to admit. 

“Hi!” Reed said with a jittery grin. 

The man turned, brows shooting behind his mess of hair. Reed noted that his eyes were greener in the sun. He was also taller in person. Every person he—for the lack of a better, generalized term—admired was always taller in person. Then his eyes widened as his jaw dropped. His gaze flicked around Reed’s body. Reed was too aware of how none of the clothes fit quite right. Then again, when wearing custom fit clothes for so long, nothing ever fit quite right.

“Hi?” He said. He turned to his friends who were inching away to scarcity. “Do I know you?” One of them, a girl, giggled into her girlfriend’s shoulder. “I feel like I’d remember a face like yours.”

Reed laughed. He’d watch his man go through all his fantasies on video that Reed never once let himself daydream about him. It was all right there. He paid for it. Now that it was happening, he wasn’t quite sure where to go, what words to use, where to put his hands.

“Andy, right?” Reed knew that wasn’t his real name but it was the only name available. ‘Andy Saunders?” A few of his friends laughed in the background then cheered. Reed would’ve been embarrassed if he hadn’t seen a couple of them be in a scene with Andy himself. No one was in a position to judge. 

Andy himself blinked several times in a second. His head vibrated in disbelief. Then he said, “To some people, yeah.” He tittered. They shook hands. Reed’s stomach pirouetted. 

“This is real random but I’m a huge fan,” Reed said. “Can I, you know, get a picture?” 

“Uh...Yeah! Sure! Anything for a huge fan!” 

“Okay! Cool! Okay!” Reed’s hand stuttered through his phone’s apps until he got the camera up. “Um…” Reed held up his camera and most of Andy’s face was out of frame. 

Andy snorted and said, “Erin. Help me get a picture here with this cutie.” 

“Sure thing, Andy,” she said, drawing out his stage name. She took Reed’s phone. “Aren’t you a little too young to be watching porn?” 

“I turned twenty-one today, actually,” Reed replied with a chuckle. 

“Today?!” Andy spread his arms. “Happy birthday! C’mere!” He pulled Reed into a hug and Reed returned it. He gripped his wrist so his hands wouldn’t wander. He was a pornstar but he was still a person. He reveled having his cheek against Andy’s chest, knowing that this would be nothing but a memory before long. 

“Thanks! This is literally the best day ever,” Reed said when the hug ended. 

“I’m glad to be part of it.” Andy eyes crinkled with a smile and it was adorable. Reed noticed a few flecks of hazel within his iris. His lashes were long and dark and curled. He wanted to memorize it. Studio lights did his eyes so little justice. His hands were warm on his shoulders, then his biceps, then Reed realized they were supposed to be taking a picture together. 

He turned the camera, clearing his throat. “Sorry. The picture.” 

“Oh don’t worry, hun!” Erin was tapping away at his phone. “You’ve got plenty.” 

“One for the ‘gram then,” Andy said. He put an arm around Reed’s waist and Reed was committing the way his fingers curled to memory. They posed. Erin got the picture. 

“Thank you!” Reed said to Erin. “Thank you so much.” He said to Andy. 

“No problem! Also, admire you going to a theme park instead of getting completely shitfaced for your twenty-first,” Andy said. 

“Yeah. That was the first plan but I didn’t want to accidentally die by doing something stupid while drunk,” Reed replied. 

“So, I won’t be seeing you in the club tonight then?” Andy asked. 

Reed shook his head. “I still have a lot of park to go today. I’ll be too exhausted.” 

“Fair.” Andy nodded once. “Nice meeting you today, um…” 

“Reed.” 

“Nice meeting you today, Reed. I hope your birthday keeps getting better.”

“Thanks!” Before Reed could do a complete turn, Andy grabbed his wrist and Reed’s bones turned to silk then reformed before he tumbled over. 

“Don’t forget to tag me in the pic if you post it.” Andy winked. His hand slipped away but still lingered. Reed’s skin was humming with feverish electricity. 

“Sure. Yeah. Of course,” Reed stammered. He didn’t mention how he wasn’t the type to follow pornstars on social media. 

Andy turned and he hit the first laughing friend he could reach. Reed couldn’t comprehend what had just happened but he was smiling so hard his cheeks hurt so it must’ve been good. He walked to the table of surprised band guys. So surprised that they hadn’t eaten their pizza. 

“What?” Reed sat down. 

“Who was that?” Clark asked. “Friend from high school?” 

“Oh, he’s a pornstar I like.” Reed realized what he was saying as he was saying it. He was already finding a hole to jump into before they could react. 

Corey whooped. Raven laughed. “Knew it,” Corey exclaimed. “Pay up!” Sinny grumbled, pulling out his wallet. 

“When did this happen?” Mikey gestured to the exchange of money. 

“We have this long standing bet on whether or not Reed watches porn,” Sinny huffed. 

“Oh my god!” Clark groaned, so did Reed. “Why are you like this?” 

“I believe you know what you signed up for, sir,” Corey countered. 

“Can we please forget what I just said?” Reed asked the umbrella above their table. 

“I’m going to say this as nicely as possible,” Raven said, putting a hand Reed’s shoulder. “We can never go back.” 

“Is it too late for me to rescind the whole ‘I don’t want to drink on my birthday’ request?” Reed said, though mostly for a laugh than an actual plea for help. Mostly. 

Sinny perked up anyway. “Wait, are you seri—” Clark shoved a pizza slice into his mouth.

* * *

“You’ve been refreshing Twitter and Instagram for the last five hours. Give it a rest.” Blaine threw a small pillow from the chair across their hotel room into Shane’s face. 

“Never,” Shane retorted with a grin he’d been sporting for those five hours Blaine mentioned. 

All six of them were convened in his and Blaine’s room, sharing three bottles of wine. Everyone had their feet up. Jude and Erin were scrunched up on a tiny table, looking through pictures of their trip so far. Micah had his feet crossed under and a thumb in his book. He was watching Shane and Blaine with amused interest. Becca was lying beside Shane, her legs up on the headboard. 

“He’ll post it when he posts it,” Blaine continued. “It’s not like your mentions are flooding with local admirers. You’re not going to miss it.” 

“Besides,” Becca added, “you wouldn’t want him to think you’re super easy and desperate.” 

“I’m a fucking pornstar. I get paid to be easy.” Shane hit Becca’s leg with the back of his hand. She returned the favor. “And I am desperate. I’m not sure if we saw the same guy here but let me remind you that he’s the single most gorgeous thing I’ve ever seen in my life and I want him.” 

“Ouch.” Micah pressed his hands on his chest. 

In earlier days, the most awkward silence came and stabbed them all in the neck. Time had buried any sort of resentment in a solid layer. “You’ll always be my first, babe. Never forget. It just didn’t work out.” There were only the faintest whispers of the weight of their past in his chest. It was overpowered by Micah’s easy laugh. 

“You right,” Micah said. 

“Love you as a friend,” Shane said and Micah echoed it. 

“He probably just wants to fuck,” Becca continued. 

“With that face he had?” Erin chimed in. “He’s probably in love with Andy Saunders,” she said the stage name with a tongue between her teeth, “and would do anything you want.” 

“You think so?” Shane asked, hopeful.

“Don’t encourage him,” Blaine retorted. “We talked about this. No dating the fans.” 

“But he’s so pretty,” Shane whined. “It’s not like he’s a major fanboy. You gotta admit, he was comparatively collected when he came up to me, if not just a smidge starry-eyed. I don’t see him blowing up my at-replies. He didn’t even try to cop a feel!” 

“While true,” Blaine said with a placating gesture, “don’t get your hopes up. This is not some rom-com.” 

“You’re right,” Shane interrupted. “Hollywood would never be that brave.” 

“Hell yeah!” Erin raised her fist to the air, so did Jude. Shane mirrored them. 

“As I was saying,” Blaine continued, “you’re in a position of power. Not to mention that guy’s own skewed expectations of Andy Saunders, not Shane Anderson. It was a random encounter and it’s probably more beneficial that it stays a random encounter.” 

Shane sighed. “I hear you. I do. But let me at least hook up with him if nothing else.” 

Blaine raised his hands. “I hereby announce that I wash my hands of this situation. I brothered you enough. I said my piece. If this goes sour, I’m not to blame.” He tipped his wine glass and threw the rest of his drink down his throat. 

“Come on, old man.” Jude threw his arm over his chair and propped his chin on the back. “Let him have an old-fashioned crush. It hasn’t been that long since we were staring at our phones waiting for the other to text and passed notes between shoots like we were in high school.” 

“Thank you.” Shane raised his wine glass at Jude. 

“That was different,” Blaine countered. “We worked in the same industry.” 

“Cameraman and talent was pretty Romeo and Juliet.” 

Shane scoffed. “Gag me.” 

“Would you want me to fluff up Micah?” Jude retorted. “Oh sorry, I mean Randy Blair.” 

Shane flipped him off with one hand and refreshed his Twitter with the other. A blue one appeared above the letter icon. He sat up. He held his breath. People were reacting around him but apart from sight and touch, nothing else was working. He tapped it. There was a message from an “@rvk.” That could’ve been anyone. That could’ve been spam. Still, Shane licked his lips and tapped the message. 

@rvk: Hi Andy! It’s Reed. Sorry, I can’t post the picture of us anywhere. I realized, belatedly, that I don’t really have a private account. I’m sure you understand that the whole “watching porn” thing is a private, personal aspect of my life. I’m not necessarily ashamed of it but...my mom follows me on Twitter and...well...a lot of other people. I need to keep the feed professional. And, I guess you can see that I don’t really follow you on Twitter or Instagram. Can’t have people know all the dirty laundry and all that haha. But please know that I like your...content and that I pay for my porn so know that. Thank you again for letting me take a picture with you. It was certainly the whipped creme on top of a sundae. I hope you understand. And please don’t post the picture on your social media as well. I’m asking you nicely and respectfully. Thank you! [Five blushing emojis] 

Right after the message was a picture of the two of them. That was definitely Reed. Confusion began to set in and constrict his lungs. His friends and brother were making grabs for the phone but he swatted them away. He tapped on Reed’s icon. 

There it was: a checkmark enclosed in Twitter-Verified Blue. Above his handle was his name, Reed Van Kamp. Following two hundred and fifty-two people with six hundred thousand, nine hundred and seventy-six followers. His bio said: Artist, with a music note emoji, a paintbrush emoji, a camera emoji, and a coat emoji at the end. His location said, “in my head” and his link was to vankamp.com. It felt like all of his blood disappeared the moment his heart stopped beating. 

“Oh my god,” Shane breathed. 

“What is it!” Erin grabbed his phone. The rest of them converged. She tapped a couple of times then her gaze darted between the phone and Shane a few times. “Oh my god.” She passed the phone to Blaine. 

“Oh my god,” Blaine said. “We’re literally a group of gays and we didn’t recognize Reed Van fucking Kamp!” 

Jude shrieked. “Excuse me?!” And he yanked the phone from Blaine’s hand to stare at the phone. “EXCUSE ME?!” 

“Woah, really?” Rebecca leaned over Jude’s shoulder. “Oh man. I mean, to be fair, who really cares about the designer’s face other than rich people.” Micah pointed at her in agreement. “I think we’re overreacting.” 

“He has a verified Twitter account,” Shane replied. “He’s got more followers and money than I can ever dream of. He’s cute. And he’s a fan of my porn videos. I think I’m fucking allowed to overreact!” 

Jude gasped. “He’s typing!” 

Everyone screamed and dove for the phone. Micah handed it to Shane. They crammed their heads together and waited for the gray dots to amount to something. 

@rvk: Please reply with something. My step brother is hounding me right now for “exposing myself” and I have to admit I’m getting really anxiously the longer I look at that seen notification. 

“You read what he said!” Jude shook Shane’s shoulder. “Reply!” 

“I don’t know what to fucking say!” 

“Just tell him you’re not an extortionist monster!” 

* * *

Clark had presented Reed with a list of things that could go wrong after he sent that direct message to a random pornstar he met at a theme park.

  1. From the way Reed worded it, Andy could ask him for money or something worse just so he wouldn’t post the photo. 
  2. This could be used as blackmail. 
  3. The tabloids were going to have a field day about how clean-cut Reed Van Kamp was cavorting with pornstars and having orgies. 
  4. His mother was going to freak out for besmirching the family name. 

As if Reed hadn’t thought of all these things right as he had a momentary lapse of judgement and included his picture with Andy in a birthday post on Instagram before closing the app in a panic. He just wanted to be nice with his message. He had essentially promised to post the photo and then tag Andy. He didn’t want Andy to think he wasn’t a genuine fan. He was. In a lot of ways. 

“Dude, just calm down,” Raven groaned. 

“The more you freak out the more freaked out Reed looks,” Mikey added. 

“I’m sorry! I just don’t want anyone to take advantage of him and a ridiculously good mood. Hilde would be pissed. You don’t understand! You haven’t seen her pissed!” 

“Neither have you,” Reed countered, a little frustrated. “You’ve only heard it from me. So please. Sit down.” 

“Sorry. Sorry.” Clark waved his hands around. 

Reed sighed out the heat of his temper. He clenched and unclenched his hand around his phone. Andy was a nice guy. From the amount of times he stalked Andy’s account, he didn’t seem like the type to do anything untoward. Especially to a fan. A paying fan. And at the end of the day, a picture with a pornstar, fully clothed, wasn’t the worst thing in the world. It would be a blow but it wasn’t a sex tape. 

His phone buzzed. It jumped out Reed’s hand and rolled a few feet away. “Oh my god.” Reed buried his face into his hands. 

“It’s okay. It’s still good,” Corey said, handing it back. “Looks like it’s him.” 

With shaking hands, it took Reed a few tries to get on his Twitter and then his direct messages. 

@AndySaundersXXX: Hello! Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me, Mr. Van Kamp. [wink emoji] I would never do anything bad to a fan haha. To be honest, we didn’t recognize you at the park and the only reason why I asked you to tag me in the photo was so I can find you again after the day ended. Are you going to be in Orlando for long or is it just for your birthday? I’ll be around the whole weekend. Just to hang out. Nothing else, I promise. [raised hand emoji] Not all the time you meet a celebrity who is also a fan, you know? But feel free to say no! It’s enough for me to know you’re out there. Thanks for the picture too. We look good together. [lipstick kiss emoji]

Reed, face burning and chest heaving, looked up at Clark and their friends. “Oh my god.” He offered the phone to them. Clark snatched it out. 

He looked up and whistled. “So not what I was expecting.” 

* * *

@rvk: I appreciate it! Truly! And sorry, I won’t be staying in Orlando for long. My flight back to New York is tomorrow night. Thank you for the offer though. Not all the time you meet a pornstar you like, you know? This is still surreal haha. Also, I’m not a celebrity. It’s just mostly my mom’s name. Anyway, I hope you have a good vacation here without any further interruptions from creeps like me haha. 

@AndySaundersXXX: I understand. [standard smiley] Have a safe flight. And just so you know, you’re the least creep-like creep I’ve ever met so don’t sell yourself short. Hope to see you again someday. I’ll cherish the photo we have forever. 

@rvk: haha. Thank you. I hope to see you again too. 

@AndySaundersXXX: [red heart emoji][orange heart emoji][yellow heart emoji][green heart emoji][blue heart emoji][purple heart emoji][pink heart with sparkles emoji]

* * *

Shane didn’t want to get too upset about Reed letting him down easy and gently. He bought another bottle of wine and drank it all in two minutes. He stalked Reed’s Instagram, which featured a picture from the day with the guys from Haven. An ugly feeling appeared in his stomach that he wouldn’t admit was jealousy, even though Clark Sawyer was his step brother and the rest of the band were obviously heterosexual. It didn’t matter what Micah said about them not knowing too much about their real personal lives. They had to be heterosexual. Shane wouldn’t be able to handle it if he had to compete with a fucking rockstar. 

His friends and brother let him wallow. They let him like every photo Reed had in his feed. They didn’t bring it up the next day when Shane’s hangover had him struggling. For all that, he was grateful. Reed was just another pretty face in the sea of pretty faces. He was out of his league. Blaine was right, this wasn’t a rom-com. He shouldn’t expect anything to happen. 

And yet, that evil, foolish voice in his brain continued to yearn. Thoughts that Shane wanted to think, led to daydreams that convinced Shane that continuing interactions with Reed was a good idea. Reed watched his videos. Reed was respectful, which wasn’t the case for most of his interactions with other fans out in the wilds of California. Reed was gorgeous in a way that statues in museums were gorgeous. He was awkward but in that adorable, quirky way that manic pixie dream girls were in mainstream media. That meant he wasn’t perfect, therefore, in a way, attainable. 

Like a person who promised to lose weight by the end of the year eating a bunch of Milky Ways in the bathroom then burying the wrappers with toilet paper, Shane sent Reed a direct message every other day. Instead of tweeting something inane like he would, he sent it to Reed. Instead of sending a meme to one of his friends, he sent it to Reed. He would ask Reed questions, knowing that he wouldn’t get a reply in hopes that one day he was going to get one. 

Once, Reed posted a picture where he posed with Julian Larson wearing one of his designs. Shane noted that most of the comments were about Julian Larson and Shane figured it was his job to bring the focus back to Reed. 

“I know everyone’s here for Julie but let’s not forget who made him look that good in the first place lol. No one does a tux like that talented cutie on the left,” his comment said, punctuated by a heart eyes emoji. 

Reed actually replied to that one. “Thank you, Andy! You’re too sweet! Haha.” Then included a pink heart emoji with a ribbon around it. 

It was all Shane could talk about for two days. He screenshotted it and made it his phone background for another week. 

“Does he even know it’s you?” Erin asked, after showing it to her for the seventh time. 

“He should. It says @AndySaunds183x. I doubt it’s subtle,” Shane retorted. 

“I mean, how sure are you that it’s even him replying. Rich people have teams for that you know,” she continued. 

“Yesterday he tweeted about how he sat on his paint palette and then almost burned down his apartment after an attempt at baking something. No assistant would tweet such a thing,” Shane replied. 

Erin stared at him. There was a pause. “I worry about you,” she said, touching his hand. 

Shane laughed. He had no idea how to get out of that one. 

Perhaps it bordered obsession. Maybe Shane had to give this up. He probably should unfollow Reed from all social media. Then Reed would post an Instagram story of him toying with acrylic paint and turn the camera to his face. His hair would be held back by a headband, his face would be marked by color, and he would trip over his studio’s smooth wooden floors. Shane dared to think that he was in love. 

“Has Reed acknowledged your existence yet?” Blaine asked after a long day at work. They sat on their couch and chowed on some well-earned pork _ adobo _. Shane moved for his phone. “Except for the Instagram comment.” 

“Not yet,” Shane replied. Blaine opened his mouth. “I already know what you’re going to say. But it’s not like I’m losing anything. I haven’t called anyone ‘Reed’ at work and I’m still able to perform if my scene partner isn’t blond and cherubic. Schedule the intervention when that happens.” 

“Okay,” Blaine said without any conviction. “It’s just that...I mean Jake asked you out the other day and you turned him down.” 

“So? I’m just not interested. Besides, you know he’s still hung up on Ace.” 

Blaine’s face scrunched with disbelief. “That was literally three years ago. I’m sure he’s done his time. What I’m trying to say is that I don’t want this crush to, you know, detach you from meaningful connections that are coming your way.” 

Shane sighed and put down his plate. He faced Blaine. “Okay. I get it. My thing with Reed is a little pathetic. Sue me for having a crush. But I’m having fun. It’s the kind of crush that neither of us would’ve entertained when we were younger. Now that we don’t have to hide and Reed’s definitely not straight, I don’t have much to lose except a smidge of my dignity when I flail about how cute he’s being on his Instagram story.”

Blaine chewed on his response for a moment. “If you say so. Know that the moment this level of crush goes on for another year, I’m pulling the plug.” 

Shane laughed. “I’ll probably tire myself out by then.” He hoped. Then his phone dinged and he picked it up just to scream. He almost dropped it on his food when he tried to screenshot the simple “haha. I didn’t realize you were messaging me so often! I’m sorry I didn’t reply sooner!” from a certain @rvk. 

Blaine propped his head on his hand as he watched Shane reply, giggling. He shook his head. “Reed Van Kamp doesn’t know what addiction he’s feeding into.” Shane countered with a middle finger. 

* * *

@AndySaundersXXX: Don’t worry about it. I know you’re a busy, busy man. [Wink emoji] They were just random stuff I threw out there whenever I thought of you. How’ve you been? 

@rvk: I’ve been doing well. I see you commenting on my posts on Instagram so I know you know haha. It’s almost Met Gala season so I’ve actually been stressed. Good stressed. Julian gave me quite a bump in requests. 

@AndySaundersXXX: “Julian” lmao like you weren’t just talking about The Julian Larson-Armstrong. So casual. And oof, I hope my incessant commenting doesn’t freak you out. 

@rvk: It doesn’t!! I like it when people comment nice things. It balances out the crap others decide to put out there [blushing smiley]. And yeah, “Julian” haha. We’ve known each other since high school so he’s just Julian to me. 

@AndySaundersXXX: bet you have a lot of dirt lmao. [Five wink with the tongue out emojis] I know you’ll keep it quiet tho. You’re too cute to be a backstabber. 

@rvk: [wide-eyed blush emoji] Thanks???? Haha. 

@AndySaundersXXX: omg i didn’t mean it like that omg i mean that you’re a lovely person and that you’ll never betray a long time friend and that was meant to be a joke and i’m sorry.

@rvk: Andy it’s fine hahaha! I get it. 

@AndySaundersXXX: [picture of Spongebob, seemingly out of breath, leaning against some coral] 

* * *

The problem with having a crush on a pornstar was the fact that Reed knew exactly what he looked like naked and having sex. Couple that with the pornstar being funny and endearing, Reed was having some problems. 

Andy was an idea. Someone to look at, someone to fantasize about, someone to warm his empty bed. Andy was a body on a screen. Andy had no discernable personality. Having a crush on him only went as far as wishing he was the one in the video with Andy, the man he kissed, touched, and fucked. 

Andy was more than just a sexy man who did nasty things and said dirty words for the entertainment of a lot of people who wouldn’t dare admit it in polite conversation. Andy was a real person. Andy was dopey and silly and excitable. He sent Reed photos that were three memes deep so he had to explain it. Now he didn’t just want to have sex with Andy, Reed wanted to hold his hand. 

Reed was being an idiot. He told himself whenever he blushed at a reply from Andy on his Instagram. (He was online there more often, therefore made more sense to talk to Andy there. And unlike Twitter, he could control who could DM him better.) 

Although Andy had proven himself trustworthy in multiple accounts, all of them culminating to the fact that Andy had not once bragged about their ongoing correspondence or even alluded to it, Reed couldn’t trust him. Logic implored, even demanded, that he shouldn’t pursue this. Andy was a pornstar. He was the son of Hilde Van Kamp. He’d heard enough horror stories about being used, for clout or for money, to keep his distance. At the very least, Andy could’ve just wanted to have sex with him for the sole purpose of saying that he fucked Reed Van Kamp. 

But his own logic fought itself. Andy would’ve given up by now, knowing that Reed wasn’t going to give. It has been months since that first set of pictures. (Pictures that Reed looked back to from time to time in moments of weakness.) It has been more months since Reed finally replied to Andy’s messages on Twitter. If he wanted something, he would’ve asked for it by now. No one nefarious would’ve kept in contact for that long without getting anything, without even a whisper of a promise of getting anything.

“Reed?” Julian asked over dinner. “You okay? I haven’t seen you this distracted since last award season.” 

Reed closed his eyes. He’d been staring at Andy’s most recent response to his story. He’d posted a picture of his outfit for tonight. Andy just did the quick “heart eyes emoji” reply. He responded to his stories with that too many times. 

He shook his head. “Sorry. Weird day.” 

“Who do we need to cancel?” Julian joked. 

Reed managed to smile. “No...It’s not that.” 

“Listen,” Julian raised his hands, “I know I’m not the best person to talk to about dealing with their problems but my therapist says that I’ve been improving. I want to pass it forward.” 

“It’s okay. It’s nothing.” Reed shoved his phone into his bag. Julian shrugged, going back to his steak. “Actually…” 

“Am I going to need more wine?” 

“No. No. It’s...it’s stupid. Dumb. A guy.” Reed flapped his hand in hopes that it would soften the blow. 

“A guy? Tell me more. You never talk about guys. Or girls.” Julian leaned on his chair. 

“Well...you date more than I do. Like,” Reed sighed, “how do you go about dating someone who isn’t...how do I say this delicately…” The more Reed struggled with the correct way of phrasing it, the more his face twisted with effort. 

Julian arched his brow. “Below your pay grade? Low on the food chain? Out of your league but in the opposite way?” 

Reed dropped his hands from helplessly gesticulating. “In cruder terms, yes.” 

“Who?” 

“You literally wouldn’t know him.” 

Without missing a beat, Julian said. “Was it that pornstar you met in Orlando for your birthday?” 

Reed choked on air, then choked on his own spit, then said, “Which one of them told you?” 

Julian laughed. “Calm down. A simple ‘no’ would’ve saved you.” 

“Which one.” 

“Sinny.” 

“That bastard.” 

“Ooh, what’s Clark been teaching you these days? Those guys are awful influences.” 

Reed groaned and drank all the wine he was avoiding to drink. He pressed his fingers into the bridge of his nose. “I don’t need this right now.” 

“Sorry, sorry.” Julian’s laughter sobered. “So, porn boy.” 

“I really don’t need this right now, Julian.” 

Julian’s patented smirk stayed in place when Reed peeked through his fingers. He placed his elbow on the table. “For what it’s worth,” his voice dropped, “if he tickles your pickle, I don’t see why you shouldn’t go for it. It’s risky, I’ll give you that, but life’s full of risks. This one might be worth your while if he’s good enough to pay for to watch. Just don’t pay for him to fly to you or buy him anything expensive or bring him anywhere nice. They get used to it. Unless you want to play sugar daddy.”

“He’s literally just a year younger,” Reed grumbled. 

“I don’t know what you’re into. That’s a staple of our relationship,” Julian said. “Just be careful. These things can turn like milk that you don’t pay attention to.” 

“Have you met me?” Reed snorted. “Disaster happens when I’m careful. I can’t imagine what would happen if I were reckless.”

“I’d love to watch.” 

“Oh god no.” Reed laughed and Julian shared it. 

After the moment had passed, Reed said, “Thank you, though. That helped me feel like I wasn’t losing my mind overthinking this.” 

“No problem. You can pay me with info on whether or not he was disappointing in bed. Never had sex with a pornstar before.” 

“Let’s get more wine.” 

And more wine they had. 

Reed could blame the wine that left a pleasant buzz that lingered on his skin. He could blame his restless brain and the time that he got back into his apartment. He could blame the stress his work gave him that lead him to seek a release. He could blame the giddy foolishness that came after an orgasm. He could blame the video that he watched. He could blame Julian and his advice. 

But all he could blame, really, was himself, come morning light when he opened his phone to end the blaring alarm and saw messages. Five from Andy and three from himself.

His first message was sent at midnight. “Hey, just watched your new video,” punctuated with a wine emoji. The next message he sent was a picture. A naked picture. In all fairness, his bedside light was diffused enough that it allowed plenty of shadows to hide behind. Most of his face was obscured by a pale arm and a few curls, but half his smile still jutted out. Another thing that jutted out was his bottom. Finally, the message below that was a simple, “I liked it a lot.” 

Reed swore that he sent those in a dream, not in real life. 

If it weren’t for Andy’s replies—his minutes-old replies—he would’ve deleted all of his social media and made an emergency call to his PR team and maybe _ 911 _ because he was sure his heart was about to give.

His first reply was a stunned, wide-eyed emoji. 

His second reply was, “I honestly thought this was a response to that dumb owl video I sent you.” 

His third reply was, “But thanks. You made my whole morning.” 

His fourth reply was a picture of his bulge under tight boxer briefs with a hand right on his thigh. 

His final reply was, “I’d love waking up to you. Sex, after all, is better than coffee,” and he punctuated it with that typical smirk emoji. 

This should’ve been a great indication of whether or not he should follow where his feelings led. Nevertheless, Reed was a groggy mess of half-hearted regret. He had this overwhelming urge to apologize, even though it was clear that an apology wasn’t in order. Any plans he had to give in to his desires had long since faded in his sleep. Unfortunately, it was replaced by anxiety, the very thing he sought to be rid of when he watched that video. Everything began going wrong ahead of him. He couldn’t stop thinking about it, despite Andy’s eager response. (That, in itself, was surprising since it would’ve been four or five in the morning in the west coast.) It wasn’t like Reed could take it back as if it never happened. There it was. Andy and Instagram as a witness. There was no right answer. There was no walking out of this unscathed. He had to say something. Anything. Before Andy said something first. 

Andy was typing. Reed kept himself from throwing his phone through his window. 

“Hey,” it said, “are you awake or did you accidentally open your insta when you tried to kill your alarm?? Lol” 

It kept going. “This message will self-destruct in two minutes.” 

“By that I mean I guess you’re still asleep and I’ll have to take care of my picture myself like you took care of yourself last night.” He punctuated with a wink emoji. 

“I mean,,, I was part of it, in a way. So,,,can’t complain.” 

“Reply when you can cutie lol.” 

Reed laid on his back and put a pillow on top of his face. He had a shoot in two hours. Traffic was gonna kill him, unless his head killed him first. He had a meeting across town after that. Then he had a late lunch with his mother. He had no idea how he was going to face her with this potential scandal sitting in his pocket. Then he had a songwriting session that Clark booked with a friend of theirs. He couldn’t do this. He did this to himself. 

After a long breath through his pillow, he tossed it away and lifted his phone. He typed, “Hey! Sorry! Can’t talk right now! Busy day ahead! Maybe later? Sorry!” Then he closed the app and stuffed his phone into his camera bag. He hurried through his morning just so he could keep himself busy and away from his phone. He looked at the time, _ 7:57 _ , then looked at his phone. Then looked at the time, _ 7:57 _ , then turned to his phone when it buzzed once more. Then twice more. Then a fourth time. Then it was silent. The time was _ 7:58 _ . No angry calls from his mom or PR. No concerned calls from other friends. It was _ 7:58 _. His hand hurt from burning himself with his toaster. 

By _ 8:03 _ , his breakfast was eaten, his outfit was picked, his photography stuff was in one spot with his phone, and all he needed was to take a shower and go. His driver was going to arrive in twenty-seven minutes. There was too much time and his hands were empty. It was _ 8:04 _ when he noted that his phone made no other noises since. Either that potential scandal stayed in his pocket or was out there just waiting for him to step on a crosswalk and kill him with a car. 

Reed brushed his teeth and then went on the toilet. _ 8:06 _, still no extra noises from his phone, not even when he tapped his feet and fingers. 

He had to look. 

Four replies from Andy: 

  1. “That’s cool. No worries. I’m very, very patient.” Wink emoji. 
  2. “Maybe something to get you through the day?” 
  3. A video of him stroking his dick and saying, “I won’t be able to stop thinking about you until we get to that ‘maybe later’ you’re teasing me with.” Then he turned his camera around to those vibrant eyes. “Good morning.” And blew a kiss. 
  4. “That one’s free of charge.” 

Reed couldn’t get a fever. He was Reed Van Kamp and he had places to be. Every patch of skin was on fire but that shouldn’t stop him. He had to get back to being busy. Andy knew he watched it. There was no way Reed could escape that. 

In a panic, Reed reply, “Thanks!” He sent it before he could stop himself. It was _ 8:09 _ when he turned off his phone and took a shower. A cold one. One that didn’t help erase the video that was seared into his retinas with Andy’s voice playing on loop in the back of his skull. 

* * *

Shane was walking on sunshine. His mind was on cloud-nine. His skin was clear. His crops were watered. Nothing could go wrong today. Not even when the sink broke or when he stepped on his neighbor’s dog’s shit when Blaine asked him to take out the trash he should’ve taken out the night before. He’d been in plenty of sex scenes. Threesomes, orgies, double penetration, bad roleplaying, edging, chains and whips—it took a lot to get him to blush. But the very thought of Reed Van Kamp’s butt and Reed Van Kamp sending that butt on Instagram after watching one of his videos had him tickled pink all over. 

At that moment, he didn’t care that Reed only knew him as Andy Saunders. He didn’t care that Reed wanted Andy Saunders and not Shane Anderson. What he cared about was that Reed sent him a legitimate and literal booty call. What he cared about was “maybe later” and the anticipation of what that meant. What he cared about was his crush complicating itself. 

“Oh god, what’s that smell?” Blaine grabbed his nose when Shane reentered their apartment. 

“A new day, my young padawan. A new day,” Shane replied clasping Blaine’s shoulder before leaving to clean his soiled slipper. 

Unlike Reed, he wasn’t busy. He had a day off from his dance classes and his porn. There wasn’t much to do except think of Reed and wait for his reply. It was awful. He was horny the whole day. Even as he tried to distract himself by playing video games, his mind circled back to a familiar drain. Having someone to film with would just be perfect right now. He wanted to look at Reed’s picture again just to get off but he had to give Reed an exclusive show that would have him crawling back for many more. The anticipation had him close to busting every time he bumped into anything. Good thing Blaine was out with Jude the whole day. He was a complete, incompetent mess of lust. He couldn’t even nap. He opened Reed’s message randomly in at four or five in the morning then stayed up a little just in case Reed wanted anything so it would’ve been easy to pass out. He got hard every time he found himself horizontal and he had to save it. 

The sun began to set. Shane stared at the clock that indicated New York’s time on his phone. He had no idea what Reed’s days were like exactly. His responses to Shane’s messages were sporadic. Sometimes he replied in the middle of a shoot or an art project. Sometimes, times like today, he didn’t reply until late at night. At this point, he could drop a _ Cheeto _ on his crotch and he’d orgasm. 

It was late afternoon at his time when he heard the notification. The second he saw Reed’s username, he ran to his room, locked the door, closed the curtains, prepared some lube, a Fleshlight, and debated whether or not he should be naked or that would be too forward. He decided just to stretch his arms a little then tossed himself on the bed. He opened the app. Sweat began to bead across his reddening skin. Then his throat closed up. There was a wall of text without any subjective emojis. 

@rvk: Hey. Sorry about how abrupt I was earlier. It’s pretty obvious that I’m not the type to send explicit pictures of myself, much less do other explicit things on the internet. I’m not going to send you any more of them and, again, I’m sorry if you were looking forward to it. That was not my intent. Really, I don’t know what my intent is or was when I first sent it. Anyway, I don’t want to ramble too much so I better just rip the bandage off. I like you. Talking to you for the last couple of months was fun and great and I enjoy reading them wherever work takes me. I’ve been hesitant in following through but after some thinking and talking, I was wondering, before we do anything or send anything further to one another… if you wanted to get to know each other more?? Like...date a little? Totally cool if you’re not 100% into it. And I know I can’t retcon what happened the night before but I’d love to restart somewhere more conventional. If you don’t mind. It’s okay if you do mind and I understand. I’m a little all over the place and confusing. Let me know. 

It certainly wasn’t what he was expecting. His worst-case scenario was Reed never replying to him at all and/or sending him a restraining order. His second worst-case scenario was Reed glossing over it as if nothing happened. When he released the breath he was holding the whole time he read the message, his insides turned into the consistency of no-bake cheesecake batter. He rolled over. The heat of his lust folding in on itself and became a gentle glow of a new stuffed animal that lit up when cuddled the right way. He reread the message again. This was better than his best-case scenario. 

“Can I call you through here?” Shane replied. He opened his curtains for more natural light. He waited for Reed to type his reply. 

“Yes. You can. Go ahead.” And Shane tapped on the video call feature on the top right. 

Reed picked up right away but he was in the middle of moving around. “Hey. Give me a sec.” There were a few clicks of light. “I just got home.” Behind him was a clean apartment with expensive gray furniture and white walls sprinkled with art in frames. Reed sat on a large seat and found a nice corner. The city looked over his shoulder from where he was positioned. He wasn’t looking at the camera. He adjusted his already rumpled shirt that reminded Shane of the clothes he wore when they first met. 

“Hi,” Shane said, when Reed got comfortable. 

“Hey.” Reed was a lovely shade of bashful pink. “So…” 

“Sorry,” Shane fluttered his lashes, “I was distracted by how handsome you are.” 

A smile flickered into view then Reed sucked his lips into his mouth and chewed on them. “Um...so… You read what I said?” 

“Yeah.” Shane laughed. “Yes, I’d love to date you first before anything. Of course. I want nothing more.” 

Reed’s head snapped to the camera, eyes wide. “What? Really?” 

“Yeah, really.” 

“Um...okay wow...Yeah. Great.” He tittered. Shane’s heart clenched and he wanted to scream at how cute Reed was. “I’ll be in San Diego for a bit. For Comic Con. My step brother and his friends wanted me to come. You’re based there, right?” 

“I feel like you already know.” Shane waggled his eyebrows. 

“Well, I didn’t want to presume... “ Reed said. 

Shane nodded, amused. “There’s this local Mexican place that I think would be fun. Unless you want to go somewhere else?” 

Reed shook his head. Shane’s grin widened and brightened. “That’ll be perfect. I’m going to be staying in LA too. I’ve got a couple of things and a friend’s birthday. I can just drive over when I’m free.” 

“I’ll go to you,” Shane said. 

“I don’t want to force you to—”

“Contrary to popular belief, a pornstar’s life isn’t that hectic. I’ll go to you. LA with you sounds fun.” 

“Okay,” Reed nodded. “Okay, great. Great. I’ll see you then. Next week.” 

“Yeah. Next week.” Shane laughed again. He couldn’t believe this was happening while the sun was up and he wasn’t unconscious. “By the way, my real name is Shane. Shane Anderson.” 

“What? Oh! Of course. Yeah. Shane. I’ll...I’ll do my best to get used to that.” 

“Great.” Shane sat up and leaned on his knee. “Since we’re here, tell me about your day?” 

Reed chortled and dragged a hand across his face. “Apart from the fact that I was panicking the whole morning after I saw what I did?” He said through his fingers. 

“Oh, I’d love to hear about that part.” Reed whined and Shane felt like he could explode into a shower of holographic glitter. 

The remainder of Shane’s afternoon and Reed’s night went by in an easy flash. Once the recounting of the earlier incident had passed with a series of laughter and Reed’s face creeping into the same color as his hair, they wandered to different things. Shane mostly let Reed talk. He had the more interesting life, after all. Reed did insist later on that he couldn’t keep swallowing the conversation and turned the metaphorical mic to Shane. He couldn’t say much. He taught dance in his spare time. He got into porn just to pay for life. He started off as a camboy and got dragged into it with his brother. And it wasn’t that weird. They managed to convince their company not to put them in scenes together, though a threesome with the “Saunders Brothers” was a favorite. Shane was pleased to hear that Reed found those a little weird. They talked through Reed’s dinner. They babbled about shows they liked watching and what they were looking forward to. Reed introduced Shane to a few podcasts. Shane introduced Reed to a couple of shows on Netflix that he would enjoy. It was easy. Shane loved that it was so easy. 

Soon enough, Blaine and Jude came back home with dinner, which was about time for Reed to go to bed. 

“Wanna say hi?” 

Reed hesitated and Shane stammered for an apology. But Reed interrupted him. “No. I want to say hi. It’d be cool. Get it over with and all that.” 

“We’re getting a lot of things over with today,” Shane said as he stood from his bed. 

Reed giggled. Shane’s knees wobbled under the sudden weight. His heart just grew five sizes. “It’s the theme of this day, I guess.” 

“Hey! We got some Thai food,” Jude said when Shane walked through his door. “I hope you don’t mind. I’ve been craving it for the whole day.” 

“Oh my god.” Shane put his free hand on his chest. “Did you fill him up enough that I’m finally going to be an uncle?” 

Jude and Blaine rolled their eyes. Blaine threw a plastic spoon at him, hitting him square on the nose. “You’re disgusting,” Blaine said. Reed laughed. “Who’s that?” 

“Oh, it’s Reed,” Shane replied with a smug smile. Jude’s eyes bugged out and he dropped to the floor. Blaine froze in place. This day couldn’t get any better. He wished that whatever secret branch of the government that filmed them would keep this file and show it to him when he was old and dying as a final request. 

“Hi?” Blaine waved. 

“Hi, Blaine,” Reed replied. 

“He knows my name?” Blaine moved his gaze to Shane. 

“Yeah,” he said like it was no big deal. He faced the camera down to Jude. “This is Jude, Blaine’s boyfriend and a huge fan of yours.” 

“Hi.” 

Jude was scrambling away from the camera and pulled himself up using a chair. “I love that shoot you did for _ TeenVogue _ with Zendaya and Hunter Schafer. The concept was amazing and inspiring,” he said in one breath.

“Thanks. That’s very kind of you,” Reed said. Jude laughed because there was nothing else to do. Shane was reveling in the discombobulation. “Uh...I can show you some outtakes when I’m over there, if you want?” 

“You’re coming here,” Blaine shouted then coughed. “I’m sorry. What?” 

“This is the best day ever,” Shane whispered to himself. 

The following week before Reed’s arrival was the longest week that could ever pass. If it weren’t for his jobs, he would’ve been so worked up by the end of it that he wouldn’t be fun to be around with. Everything else was as it were. He sent messages to Reed and Reed replied whenever he could. However, Shane, emboldened by the promise of their date, sent more flirtatious messages. They were often sent whenever Reed posted anything with his face on it. They also often started with: “I can’t say this in the comments but…” Reed seemed to enjoy them. He even replied to a couple of Shane’s stories. His world was being pulled inside out and he loved it. 

On the day of Reed’s arrival to California, he stalked Haven’s stories to see if he got any extra Reed content. He did. In the form of Clark Sawyer filming Reed walking through LAX with a large suitcase and then tumbling over seemingly nothing, spilling his coffee and then sending a couple more people over. The next post was of Reed, with an ice pack on his chin, and Clark, thumbs up to the camera. The caption read: “He’ll live. Better get some bubble wrap tho.” 

“I have to say,” Micah said, looking over Shane’s shoulder, “he’s just the kind of disaster you crave.” 

“Thank you,” Shane replied. Micah ruffled his head. 

The date was set for early evening. The sun was a bright gold and setting was an idea it was having. Shane drove Blaine’s car, the only car, to a hotel that he could spend just one night in before having a crisis about his savings. Reed wasn’t hard to spot at the door. He looked as immaculate as ever. And although Shane wore the best and cleanest things he could prepare, he still felt underdressed compared to him. This was just a dinner at a Mexican place. There was no way for him to be underdressed at a middle-tier Mexican place. 

Clark wasn’t hard to spot either. He was a good foot taller than everyone in the immediate vicinity. His stony face became more evident the closer Shane drove. He slurped nervously on his _ RedBull _ then parked. He grabbed the bouquet of sunflowers—Reed’s favorites, a fact he had to scour the internet for—and jumped out of the car to open the passenger side door. He moved fast enough that he was already halfway there when Reed noticed him. 

“Shane?” Reed’s cheeks were pink and perfect. 

“Hi.” Shane took his sunglasses off and extended the bouquet. “For you. Should last you for your trip here in California.” His gaze kept flicking from Reed’s glee to Clark’s stoic expression. 

“Thank you. They’re beautiful.” Reed took them and pressed his face to them. 

Shane opened the door and gestured to it. “Sir.” 

Reed grinned and Shane didn’t think driving was such a good idea anymore. “Thank you. Clark, it’s okay. Just go.” A large hand fell on Shane’s shoulder and he craned his head to meet Clark’s eyes. He tried to roll his shoulders and straighten his spine to make himself seem bigger and not the least bit intimidated. And failing.

“Take care of him, okay? He’s fragile,” Clark said with a sharp smile. 

“Yup. Will do. He’s the most precious man I’ve ever had the pleasure of taking on a date,” Shane replied in a hurry. 

“Good.” Clark clapped Shane’s shoulder and Shane was happy he worked out today. His knees just almost buckled. Clark stepped back but made no move to leave. 

“You had your big brother moment. Please just go,” Reed said. Clark raised his hands, turned, and walked away. Shane sighed. “Sorry about him.” 

“No, I get it. I’m just a random pornstar after all.” 

“No, you’re not.” Reed kissed him on the cheek and slid into the seat. Shane closed the door then did an easy, small pirouette before walking to the driver’s side. Thus began the best two weeks of Shane’s life. 

Despite their long days and a few long drives, Reed and Shane managed to find time to either grab dinner or grab breakfast. Never lunch. Never overnight, except for that one time Shane had one shot too many and couldn’t drive back to his hotel room in LA. They woke up together and Shane loved every second of it, even if they didn’t have sex. It was always one thing or the other. They were both adults. He knew that they could’ve done it and it wouldn’t have complicated anything. After all, their beginning was overlaid by dozens of sexual events in the days, even months, leading up to it. 

Still, Shane kept both their pants on. It was one thing and the other. They were too tired to do more. Reed had stuff to do the next morning. They ate too much spicy cheese. For Shane, he wanted to avoid fucking this up with fucking. He was sure that the moment would present itself before Reed left. 

But they kissed. Every chance that they got, they kissed, and Shane found himself content with that. They kissed as they fell asleep, and they kissed when they woke up. They kissed at the parking lot of that Mexican place that they first had a date. They kissed before they said hello. They ranged from short and sweet to sloppy and heavy. They took any excuse they could find outside prying eyes. And they held hands. In the car, under the table, up until they had to say goodbye. They held hands wherever they went and that was when Shane got his first taste of paparazzi. The place they ate at was just a block away from his hotel and a few of them buzzed about. It wasn’t crazy or blinding or anything like that. Nothing truly star-level but it was still jarring. At first he thought Reed was going to let go but they only served to make him hold on tighter. 

“Who’s the guy, Reed?” 

“My boyfriend?” He replied and Shane didn’t care if Reed lied the rest of the way back. That was the only truth that mattered. 

“What’s your name, kid?” One asked. 

“Don’t answer that.” 

“Aw, c’mon Reed. All we want is a name.” 

“You’ll find out eventually,” Reed countered. 

“Just the first name,” they continued. “A fake name even!” 

“You heard the guy,” Shane stepped in. “You’ll find out.” 

They ignored the rest of the questions. When they got to the hotel and got into the elevator, they started laughing. 

On Reed’s very last day, Shane was so sure that they were going to have sex. Their days were free. There was nowhere else to go. They’d seen everything and been anywhere they could. Somehow, Shane forgot. They just laid on the bed, binge-watching a bad Netflix show and telling profanities at it. They ate their weight in room service dessert. After that, they stared at each other and talked about what came next. Then they started kissing. Slow and careful with wistful tears mingling a little bit when Shane admitted that he would miss Reed even though he was just across the country. Then the sugar crash came. Shane’s fluttered close once and when he opened them, sunlight beat against the thick curtains. Reed was pressed against him. All he did was hold on. 

After relaying this to the rest when he finally went home, Blaine was first to break the silence. “Bro, that’s gay.” 

Shane snorted into a laugh. “Fuck you. Like you and Jude aren’t the most disgusting couple to ever walk the either.” 

“You’re certainly giving us a run for our money,” Jude retorted. 

“Man, that was some cute ass shit,” Erin dabbed a tissue under her eyes. “Fuck, you’re going to make me fix my make-up. Fuck you.” 

It was nice to be back with his friends but his hand was tight around his phone, just waiting for Reed to tell him he got back to New York safe and sound.

* * *

Dating Shane Anderson would’ve been easier if he wasn’t a public figure. That wasn’t to say dating him wasn’t the best thing that ever happened to him. Notoriety just added a layer that Reed would’ve preferred not to deal with. But there they were. Opinions on whether or not he should go public with it. The anxiety that came with that. Useless emails from people who want the inside scoop that were crowding the emails Reed wanted to reply to. Conversations with his mom about Shane. Having to tell people not to ask him questions about relationships at a couple of interviews he had to do. Stammering through “no comments” and subject changes. 

Shane telling him that he’d saved up to visit Reed in New York made him more nervous than he should’ve been. This was getting serious. He had to survive a dinner with his mom. They were going to be spotted together again and while New York was more chill about these sort of things, people were still going to talk and take pictures and then speculate. And of course he wanted to share Shane with the world and he didn’t care that he was a pornstar. And in retrospect, their first meeting would be a hilarious story to share when it came down to it. 

“It’s just that...at the end of the day, I want to keep all of this quiet. I want to keep you safe from the scrutiny,” Reed said, one of the days leading up to Shane’s visit. He was curled up on his office chair, a large comforter draped over his head. Shane was on the other side of the screen, pillow under his chin. 

“That’s really sweet and I get it, but I’m a big boy now,” Shane replied. “I really won’t mind it. I don’t know if you know this: being a pornstar means that people say weird things to you without prompting. I think I can handle a few nasty words thrown about.” 

“I know...I know…” Reed nodded to himself. “I’m just afraid.” 

“I’m meeting Hilde Van Kamp, so am I.” They shared a laugh. “We’ll be afraid together. Hold each other’s hand through it and all that shit.” 

“You’re so romantic.” Reed shook his head. 

“Baby, I know. Now go to sleep. Everything will be fine.” 

“Everything will be fine.” 

“Yeah. You have an early morning tomorrow for that fitting. No more dillying or dallying.” 

Reed sighed. He couldn’t believe that he had the distinct pleasure of calling the goober in the screen, wearing a onesie, his boyfriend. “Yes, sir.” 

“Ooh, ‘sir.’ I like that.” 

Reed cast his eyes to the ceiling. “Goodnight.” 

“Goodnight, darling. Sweet dreams.” And the connection ended. That was certainly a weight off of his chest. He wasn’t so sure he could trust Shane’s reckless optimism. Not everything was going to be fine, but it did give him hope that most of it was going to be fine. With that thought in mind, right after his night time routine, he posted a picture of Shane he snapped the last time they were together to his story. 

It was a funny picture of Shane getting stuck in one of Reed’s shirts that he tried on for fun. He was one size smaller but for some reason it was just too tight for Shane. His face was obscured. Half ot the shirt was up his arms and his fingers were struggling to pull it off of him. A tuft of curly hair peeked above the hem. The caption was: “Can’t wait to see this dummy in a couple of days,” with a sparkling heart emoji and a calendar emoji. 

Shane replied, “Swoon.” And Reed liked that reply before falling asleep. 

Those couple of days passed. The world didn’t blow up after the picture so Reed was in high spirits. There were more emails about it but he had someone delete them for him. He could feel eyes on him as he worked. He was aware of every moment whispers stopped when he walked over. His heart raced every time and his palms were always sweaty, but no one came up to stab him or anything like that. They could speculate all they wanted. What mattered was that his boyfriend was hours away from arriving. 

Reed picked up Shane at the airport. The moment his driver stopped, he shot himself out of the door and into the pavement. Shane’s laughter trumped the pain that bolted through his torso. He grinned, glad that the box of caramel chocolates didn’t spill. Shane picked him up with both hands. “You okay, cutie?” 

“Yes. Yeah! You’re here!” Reed put the box into Shane’s hands. 

Shane made an exaggerated gasp. “For me? You shouldn’t have!” 

Reed giggled, kissing Shane’s cheek. “Let me get your bag.” 

“I’d rather not have my boyfriend be decapitated by closing a car’s trunk, thank you very much,” Shane said as he pulled the handle from Reed’s hands. Reed let it happen. 

They climbed into the car giddy like they just finished a bar crawl and this was their Uber. Reed was excited, but he didn’t realize he’d be vibrating with it. Although they spoke the night before, Shane had so much to share. He talked about almost missing his alarm, then about this man in front of him at TSA, and then his in-flight movie, and then almost forgetting his wallet in the airplane lavatory. As they approached the city, Shane stared at every building and joked every few blocks that the building they passed looked like the building from _ Friends _. It was his first time in New York. 

“Anywhere in particular you want to go?” Reed asked. 

“Oh, I want the full tourist experience. I want to get my I heart NYC shirt and go to Times Square. I’ll tourist so hard you’ll come to resent me,” Shane answered, hand on Reed’s thigh. The other, metaphorical one on his heart. The literal one in the box of caramels that he already consumed half of. 

“I’m sorry, Aberdeen,” Reed told the driver. 

They laughed. “All in a day’s work, Mr. Van Kamp. Brings me back to the old days.” 

“They were a tour guide before,” Reed supplied. 

“Oh my god, as if I can’t be more obnoxious today,” Shane announced. They all shared a laugh. 

The plan was to come back to the apartment, order some food, have Shane settle for a moment (which seemed impossible at this point), and prepare for a long walkabout New York City. It spanned an hour and a half. Their food was already waiting at the kitchen counter when they arrived. Shane glanced around the apartment. 

“It’s so weird,” he said, “now that I’m here after seeing it all through a screen. The ceilings are higher than I thought they were.” And in typical tall person fashion, he jumped and tried to reach the ceiling. 

“Why do tall people do that?” Reed crossed his arms, watching him jump. 

“I don’t actually know. Just to show off how tall we are?” Shane shrugged. 

Reed loved him and that left his insides soggy. During the lull in conversation, Shane did one turn before facing Reed. One hard pulse echoed through Reed’s chest and body. His fingers and toes and ears grew hot. His mouth was dry. Another pulse rocked past his pelvis. He was spurred forward. Shane caught his lips without flinching. He chuckled into the kiss, sending sparks across Reed’s face. Shane pushed them to the nearest wall. Reed ran a hand up the nape of Shane’s neck and threaded it through his hair. Their mouths opened. The chocolate on Shane’s tongue was as overpowering as it was delicious. With his free hand, Reed fisted the collar of Shane’s shirt. 

Shane pulled away with a gasp. “Are we really doing this now?” He’d bent down so he could press their hips together. 

“Yeah?” Reed mumbled. “Unless you—” 

Shane interrupted him with a kiss. “Unless I nothing.” He peeled his shirt off. “We can reheat the food. Tell Aberdeen to take a long lunch.” Reed didn’t have a chance to do that. Shane had him pinned to the wall with both hands on his hips. The thought of doing anything else was burned away not a minute later. 

Shane unbuttoned his pants as Reed untied his bowtie. Shane pushed his hand under the elastic of his underwear and Reed’s breath stuttered, hands digging into the skin on Shane’s neck. Shane left his mouth, trailing kisses downward. Even with his shirt blocking the full contact of Shane’s lips down his torso, Reed still burned. When Shane pulled down his bottoms to his knees and put his mouth around Reed’s hardened but sensitive flesh, Reed’s entire body seized with a strong current of pleasure. He clutched Shane’s curls for balance. Shane hummed, amused, around him. Reed’s throat was dry. He wasn’t sure what breathing properly meant anymore. 

Reed began unbuttoning his shirt. Shane kept him upright, hands on hips, on waist, on chest. His warm, wet mouth worked him relentlessly. His tongue swirled around the top as he hollowed his cheeks then he went lower, nose against Reed’s skin. Reed moaned. He threw his head back with a dull thud that actually hurt. 

“You alright there?” Shane chuckled as he stroked Reed. His thumb played with the top while he waited for Reed to respond. Reed didn’t know if he could respond. Shane smiled then went back to work. His eyes didn’t leave Reed’s as his mouth curled around him. He bobbed his head, not all the way down. Shane watched Reed’s face go through every sensation that accompanied every motion. He tongued the length of his shaft. Reed touched Shane’s jaw, revelling in how real his heat was. For so long he watched Shane’s videos as Andy and now that he was here, now that it was happening, his mind couldn’t compute how fortunate he was in that moment. 

“If you want to call me Andy, I won’t mind,” Shane murmured against tender flesh. 

“Andy’s not my boyfriend,” Reed stammered. Shane mouthed his way lower and lower Reed’s dick as he said it. When Reed managed to finish his sentence, he was already balls deep. Then Shane pulled away. “You did that on purpose,” he continued to stammer. 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing, cutie,” Shane replied. He buried his face into Reed’s balls, sucking softly, rolling them along his tongue. Reed choked on yet another breath. He gripped Shane’s wrists to make sure he didn’t take a tumble. He scrunched his eyes and watched the stars form under his lids. Reed kept his eyes closed when Shane put his dick in his mouth again. 

Reed swore that Shane was going to make him bust in his mouth but Shane climbed up Reed’s body right before the incline grew too steep. Both their chests heaved. Reed found Shane’s hips as they kissed. His fingers dug in when Shane ground their hips together. “Bedside table,” Reed muttered. 

“Prepared for my arrival, did we?” 

“Well, it’s not like we’re saving anything for marriage,” Reed replied, “even though it seemed like we were.” 

Shane guffawed, unable to continue for the moment. His laughter infected Reed. They stood there, quarter-naked, giggling messes. “I love you so much,” Shane said before another searing kiss. 

“I love you more,” Reed countered. 

Shane snorted. “If you say so.” 

They made their way to the bed, stripping, kissing, and stumbling along the way. Reed pulled out the condoms and lube. Since they dialed it back for a second, though Shane was still stroking them both together and kissing his neck, Reed managed to text his driver to take a couple of hours off. They replied with a wink and a thank you. Then they went back to kissing with Reed on top of Shane, legs tangled between one another. 

Reed pushed himself up. “How do you want to do this?” 

Shane’s gaze flickered from the lube, their crotches, then slowly all the way up Reed’s eyes, which had Reed quivering as though Shane touched him everywhere he looked. “Whatever you want.” Reed nodded, unsure. He took a couple of deep breaths then Shane kissed him. “Don’t worry. I’m off the clock. I won’t critique you.” 

“Shut up.” 

“Make me.” 

Reed kissed him again, tongue sliding in with ease. He pushed Shane’s legs apart, situating himself in between. Reed palmed for the lube and doused his fingers in it. He propped himself up with one arm. First, with his free hand, he covered both of their dicks. He squeezed them both together. Shane gasped. Their kissed paused long enough for Reed to say, “Okay?” His fingers trailed to Shane’s hole. Their dicks continued to touch, just barely. Shane nodded. Emboldened, Reed swirled his finger around Shane’s entrance, earning a slight tremble. He watched every twitch of Shane’s face when he pushed his middle finger in until he was knuckle deep in tight flesh. When Reed began to circle a specific area with the pad of the finger, Shane arched a little from the bed and grabbed his face. 

“More please. Please sir, I want some more,” Shane said with an awful accent between their lips. Reed laughed anyway and obliged after a couple of minutes of teasing. 

Shane whined when Reed’s ring finger joined the fray. The vibrations of it ran from his lips and sent chills thundering down his spine. Shane clenched around his fingers, making Reed’s dick jump a little with earnest anticipation. Reed pushed himself upright, sitting on his legs. Now this other hand was free, he turned his attention to Shane’s neglected dick. As he continued to work Shane’s hole with even thrusts and measured swirls, he began stroking. He twisted his wrist. He pressed his thumb up the underside, squeezing when he reached the top. Shane arched again. 

“You’re really good at that,” Shane huffed, bucking up into Reed’s fist and then down into Reed’s fingers. 

“Thanks, learned from the best.” 

Shane tittered. “Just realized...You know more about my body than I do yours. It’s a little unfair.” 

“I would argue that between the two of us, you’re the expert.” Regardless, Reed maintained the tightness of his grip and rammed his fingers into a spot in Shane that he found earned a whimper every now and then when pressed. 

Shane gasped and it tapered into a breathless laugh. “Oh you monster. Unfair advantage.” 

Reed shook his head. “You’ve had years of experience!” 

“Are we fighting? Is this our first fight?” In retaliation, Reed did that again but faster. One of Shane’s hands gripped Reed’s wrist. “Just fuck me already please.” 

Slippery fingers struggled with the condom packet. Then they giggled their way with the condom itself. One would think two adults would be able to do it with efficiency but Reed supposed they were so happy they regressed to a more hormonal age. When they managed to do it, Reed made up for lost time. He inched himself into Shane with tentative nudges. Any insecurity he had about Shane’s other, better endowed partners on the screen dissolved while watching the ecstacy that danced across Shane’s face. The last, lingering whispers of it were gone when Shane’s smile widened at the first thrust. His lips parted, ready for the taking. 

Reed leaned in, elbows shaking as he maintained composure. After all the hungry, desperate kisses, this first kiss with Reed snug inside of Shane was so chaste. Reed adjusted himself, sending bursts of electricity with every motion. Shane cradled his face with both hands. In a way, this was Reed signalling that Andy needn’t come out. A performance wasn’t necessary. There were no cameras. Just their first time. 

Reed began thrusting. Shane kept his ass clenched, which had Reed scrambling for some semblance of control if he wanted to continue. Shane whimpered every so often. His hands ran over Reed’s shoulders, then back. They rested on his hips and Shane helped him find a better tempo. After that, they found their way to Reed’s ass and gave him a great squeeze as Shane murmured, “Harder…” His nails dug into supple flesh when Reed obliged. 

Shane flipped them over. Reed gulped a deep breath. After they lingered on yet another kiss, Shane sat up and pressed his hands on Reed’s stomach. His hips began to roll in easy, titillating motions. Reed left scratches down Shane’s thighs as his hips created shapes that Reed could no longer comprehend. Shane bounced on his lap and twirled his pelvis in one smooth motion. Pleasure speared Reed in the base of his spine through to the base of his stomach. Shane smirk grew more and more smug the louder Reed moaned. Reed couldn’t even meet Shane’s body with thrusts of his own. Whenever he did, his body received a shock that rippled through his bloodstream. And he wanted this to last as long as possible. 

Shane stopped. Reed huffed and ran a hand through his hair then down his face. Shane snorted and Reed laughed. They began to share it. Shane leaned down to kiss his nose, then his cheek, and then his lips. His hands trailed up his chest. Everywhere their skin met sizzled. It was like Shane was branding him with his fingerprints and Reed didn’t mind one bit. If he was anyone’s, he was Shane’s. 

“My turn?” Shane asked Reed’s pulse. 

Reed just nodded. 

“You’re so red.” 

“That happens,” he managed after Shane eased himself and the condom off Reed. 

After Shane put his own condom on, he turned Reed over. Reed gave no resistance, his lips long turned into balloons. He pressed his feverish face into his bed and tried to catch his breath. It didn’t last long when he felt Shane’s lips then teeth on his ass cheek. Then on the opposite one. Then when Shane gripped his dick. Reed closed his eyes, shuddering when a tongue met his hole. Shane’s mouth closed around it and lapped away. Reed gripped the sheets, gasping then moaning then crying aloud. 

Shane curled his fingers around Reed’s waist as he pushed his face in between Reed’s cheeks. His ravenous mouth threw Reed’s mind into a tornado of almost incomprehensible satisfaction. Shane mirrored this satisfaction by humming with each taste. He pulled away, thumbing Reed’s entrance. 

“I have to be honest. I thought you’d be quieter,” Shane commented as though he wasn’t pushing his thumb into Reed. 

“And I thought you’d be louder, but I guess we don’t know each other that well,” Reed stuttered. 

“We should date. Are you free tonight?” Shane asked when he replaced his thumb with his index finger. Reed reminded himself to breathe, focusing on that instead of answering. That earned him a playful nudge in a tender spot. And another. Shane leaned over him, pressing a wet kiss on the space behind his ear. “What was that? I couldn’t hear you.” 

Reed shook as Shane added a finger before he could respond. “I’m busy today. I have to show my boyfriend around the city.” Shane laughed. With his free hand, he guided Reed into a kiss and Reed whimpered through it as Shane teased his hole. 

Once he was done, Shane pushed the rest of Reed’s body into the bed. The friction on his crotch from his bed was a welcome sensation. More so when Shane put his weight on Reed’s hips while he penetrated. Shane’s breath was heavy on the juncture between Reed’s shoulder and neck. His teeth sank in the same time Shane was all the way in. Reed’s jaw trembled with a soundless moan. Shane began thrusting, each one deep and hard but loving at the same time. Their lips and tongues twirled and tangled. Reed wrapped an arm around Shane’s head so he could grip his hair, hoping to pull him closer, hoping to have Shane leave no inch of him untouched. 

When Shane began to pick up the pace, Reed dropped his head to the bed so he could breathe. Shane had one of his hands pinned down, fingers threaded and laced through one another. His free hand wound around Shane’s taut bicep. His stomach clenched as Shane’s form pushed him further and further, filling him up to the brim. Just when Reed was able to gather himself to muster pushing into Shane’s thrusts, Shane growled and pulled them both upright. Reed moaned until he was lightheaded when he fell on Shane’s lap. 

“Do you feel that?” Shane pressed his fingers into Reed’s abdomen, a few inches about his crotch. He began grinding them together. “That’s me,” Shane whispered into Reed’s pulse. “Right there,” he added with a thrust. 

“Okay, you don’t have to boast,” Reed stammered without any conviction. Shane let out a broken chuckle as he moved Reed’s hips in tandem with his. 

Shane was all inside of him. Reed raised both arms to hold onto Shane’s head. Shane wrapped his long fingers around Reed’s cock and began stroking to a rhythm that Reed wasn’t thinking about anymore. He found himself bouncing into Shane. He chased the euphoria that began to crest in the horizon. He threw his head back into Shane’s shoulder. He moaned for more until there was too much. He left scratches across Shane’s neck when the climax came crashing through him. Tremors rocketed through him like it hadn’t before. Shane was still stroking him through it, one hand clutching the inside of his quivering thighs. Finally, when Reed’s core unclenched, Shane began to thrust again in slow, even bursts. Kisses were peppered and sprinkled along the red splotches of his torso. 

“Was that too fast?” Reed mumbled. 

“No, that was perfect,” Shane replied. “I can keep going if you want.” 

“Please,” he repeated with every thrust. 

Shane was slower this time. His lips were right on the shell of Reed’s ear. His moans were more breathy as Reed cinched himself around Shane’s form. Shane’s arms were still around him and he held onto them to stay upright. Before long, Reed was hard again. What energy he thought he’d lost in that standing ovation of an orgasm roared through him again as Shane picked up a steady pace.

Just as Shane began stroking him again, Reed gripped his wrist. “Can I go again?” He asked. 

“You are so hot right now. Yes, please,” Shane moaned. Reed couldn’t help a bashful giggle. 

They switched around, got a new condom, and Reed laid on his back. Shane straddled him without any protest. Reed filled him back up again, hands on Shane’s hips and ass. His nails dug into toned muscle and began thrusting upward. There was a hitch in Shane’s heaving breath. Then he went back to that perfect grind that Reed had memorized for the next time they were separated. Shane leaned over, lacing their fingers again. His hips didn’t stop moving as their lips tangled once more. 

“I’m getting close again,” Reed mumbled. “I’m sorry it’s going by so...You’re just...too good at this.” 

“Am I?” Shane pressed their foreheads together. He led Reed’s hand to his rock hard cock. His breath quivered when Reed gripped him. “Tell me more. I need a review from a paying customer.” 

Reed laughed, stroking him faster than he was thrusting. “Shut up.” Reed freed his other hand to pull Shane back into a kiss. Shane rolled his hips into Reed’s hand and backed it into his dick in easy motions. Reed’s hands tightened around Shane. Shane fisted the sheets on either side of Reed’s head. Reed intended for Shane to finish first but failed. Shane buried Reed into him deep and then gyrated just enough times for the orgasm to pull him under, taking away every sense until there was nothing but touch. His hips continued to push into Shane and his hands, though stuttered with surprise, managed to keep stroking. He heard Shane crying out before he felt him unload over his hands and stomach. 

When Reed opened his eyes and his lashes batted the fuzzy stars away from his sight, he saw Shane grinning down at him. He clenched around Reed once more, getting a broken whimper in return, then pulled away. He leaned into Reed for a breathless kiss. Reed was still trembling for his second orgasm in such a short span of time. He held onto Shane, ignoring the stickiness in between them. He let his hands explore a little. He even chanced a little spank with one hand. Shane laughed into the kiss. 

Reed pulled away first with Shane’s lips moving towards him like they were magnetized. “That was amazing.” 

“I know. We should do it again. Any fantasies you’d like me to fulfill?” 

Reed shook his head and touched Shane’s face. Shane’s nose scrunched up a little from the smell. “No fantasies. Just you.” 

Shane’s eyes seemed to water and Reed began to ask him what he’d done wrong but he was interrupted by another chaste kiss. 


End file.
